Monday, January 2, 2012

I always win my battles! Except apparently with inanimate objects… CURSES!! >:/


So first things first: I’m a lover, not a fighter… okay, okay I’m lying! I can’t even say that without giggling.  = ) I just like to be right is all, it’s not that I LOVE to fight or anything. (But there is SUCH a sense of victory in knowing I’m right and winning that fight, whether I’m actually right or the other person gave up because I’m THAT stubborn) Anyway, the point here is I don’t go looking for fights or anything and if I do it’s going to be a fight I KNOW I’ll win. So that being said, it’s my very sad duty to report that I lost a major battle this week with a wily, lone showerhead. Yes, that’s what I said – a showerhead!! A crafty, devious showerhead bent on destruction. You weren’t there… you don’t know!

I was visiting a cousin this week in an attempt to connect with my family and get away for a day or two. It was a great visit and I felt super relaxed after a very hectic holiday week. Before leaving I decided to of course bathe and was first struck dumb by the cunning bathtub’s mechanisms… I couldn’t figure out how to turn the dang thing on!! I turned this knob, adjusted that switch, even reached up to the removable showerhead. (I believe THAT is when I first challenged it to a duel!!) After sheepishly asking my cousin for help, the water was a-flowing.

Now we don’t need the scary movie shower scene scenario inserted here at all – sorry, that’s another kind of story altogether… BUT once I stepped into the shower I noticed the water was spraying from the showerhead a little funky. So I reached up to adjust it when it fell from its cradle. As it descended to the floor it shot blistering water at me burning my skin off. Okay I’m being melodramatic here – but that sucker was still hot! That vicious thing literally slithered like a snake spraying up at me. All I could do was stick out my arms and kick it. Now a smarter me would have just turned off the water, right? Well don’t forget this has all the makings of a classic Mei Mei Moment and of course that became the furtherest thing from my mind. I continuing to wrestle with this sneaky showerhead until I finally subdued it. The damage was done though… I meekly finished my shower and turned off the water, gently placing the head back in its cradle. (I didn’t want to further seek it’s wrath.)

My only solace to this disastrous loss? The amazing memory foam bath mat that caressed my feet when I stepped out the shower. I swear it was like stepping on a cloud!! It was almost like a parting gift of sorts. I stood there for a few moments, tending to my bruised ego and plotting my revenge.

Mark Twain once said “I thoroughly disapprove of duels. I consider them unwise and I know they are dangerous. Also, sinful. If a man should challenge me, I would take him kindly and forgivingly by the hand and lead him to a quiet retired spot and kill him.” Oh yea, showerhead… it’s on!

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